Do you think God does not know your trials?

At the end of her life, French actress/playwright and secret mystic, Gabrielle Bossis had a serious illness that required surgery. It was painful, scary, and exhausting to recover from it. Jesus, knowing she had a terrible fear of death, allowed this to happen as a dress rehearsal for her real death the following year. Listen to how Jesus talks to her as she recovers from surgery. Here is her journal entry from the book "He and I" of Sept 29, 1949 : "You see the difference, don't you, between the life you offered Me before the trial and the one you want to offer Me now? Wasn't it good for you to feel yourself approaching the end of life so that you could see in the full light of reality the difference between life on earth and eternal life? You can believe, can't you, that your God used this trial as a new way of getting your attention so that you would take a firmer grip on Him? Do you think I don't know about the trial I've asked you to bear?"

++ This reading hit me hard because every January my business takes a nose time. As the primary breadwinner for the family, I feel this responsibility very keenly. I work very hard all year to keep the pipeline of work flowing smoothly, to keep my income steady. After the holidays, folks are not spending money and in the cold, dark months many folks don't even think about having any paint projects in their homes. Added to this normal cycle, I live in Michigan, which has been in a recession for many years before it became a national issue. I've seen dozens of neighbors and friends lose their jobs, even lifelong careers. Some cannot find work for a long time, even if they consider moving out of state. Many take low-paying work, just to survive. Sadly, we know families who have lost their homes. With little savings in reserve, I know it could happen to us as well. While we do all that we can to avoid that, we know it is not impossible. Our situation is not on the same level as those facing the end of life, but it is a test of our faith nonetheless. Five years ago, I had many sleepless nights fretting over the January slump in my business. My family will tell you how hard that was on me and the efforts I made to correct the situation. Over these years my trust in God has grown, as I see Him work in ways beyond my expectations or efforts - work coming out of nowhere! Time and time again, I have no work at all, and out of the blue, I get a call or several calls and my week gets filled up. God uses these real-life issues to speak to me - about His providence, about His faithfulness, and His care for me personally. He has taught us that we can expect Him to provide. These lessons spill over into other challenges we face. So we are growing in trust. Michael O'Brien's latest novel "The Island of the World" has a character who says "when you are gripped by fear, you must not deny it, but you need not surrender to it either, as if that is the end of the story." Perfect love casts out all fear. As God told Gabrielle in another passage of the book "He and I" : "I create frightening situations to test your faith and call you closer to Me". Let Him work this way. In His will is our peace.